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Jill Manning spoke about the impact pornography can have on wives.“It has been troubling and intriguing to me,” reports Dr.Manning, “how many times I encounter derogatory beliefs about this group of women, beliefs that dismiss the magnitude of the issue and the legitimacy of it, by framing them as pathological, overreacting, and frigid women who need to lighten up. ’” Some women, in fact, have “lightened up.” Not all wives react negatively to their husbands using pornography.Ana Bridges from University of Arkansas’ psychology department says in her own research she has met many women who have justified their husbands’ behavior.
“But the problem is, it’s not actually a sexual experience, it’s a experience that your body gets trained for.Why would Peter Cook spend ,000 on Internet porn when he could come home to Christie Brinkley?Why would Charlie Sheen be drawn to a digital harem, being married to Denise Richards?Pornography trains men to be consumers, to treat sex as a commodity, to think about sex as something on-tap and made-to-order. Mary Anne Layden writes, “It is toxic miseducation about sex and relationships.” Dr. He has, in effect, been castrated visually.” We might say the real problem with pornography isn’t that it shows us too much sex, but that it can’t show us enough about what real sex is.Judith Reisman summarizes it well: Pornography causes impotence—an inability to function with your own sexual power. Porn treats sex one-dimensionally, packages it in pixels and rips it from its relational context.
Shelli remembers well the day her husband John called her up to confess his secret obsession with pornography.