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Sharing is weakness, and weakness is something to be avoided among men. Since men are socialized to not be connected with our emotions – outside, of course, from anger and lust – we tend to from seeking emotional intimacy outside of their relationship; many people feel as though this were a potential threat to their romantic bond. (Interestingly, there is even some of this amongst gay men; there are subsets of gay men who try to compensate against the stereotype of being “queeny” by trying to be hypermasculine and straight-presenting as possible…
Weakness and vulnerability can only be shown to those who are not in a position to damage our status in the masculine hierarchy. And to be sure: to an outside observer (or a significant other, for that matter) many platonic male-female relationships can seem like an intensely romantic connection, even when they’re nothing of the sort. But even then, it’s transitory, even suspect at best, because straight men “inevitably” want to sleep with their female friends. complete with the same prohibitions against masculine affection).
We’ve traded intimacy, support, trust and closeness for activity buddies.
It’s a cultural issue, part of the kabuki theater of gender roles that we still live by – men are the doers while women are the nurturers. Women are from greater levels of emotional intimacy, especially with other men. As I’ve mentioned before, men are taught to be disconnected from their emotions. and that’s pretty much just as femme-y as the other guy, so clearly the two of you might as well go out back and blow each other, right? Cognitive scientist and public intellectual Steven Pinker urges us to step back from the gory headlines and prophecies of doom, and instead, follow the data: In seventy-five jaw-dropping graphs, Pinker shows that life, health, prosperity, safety, peace, knowledge, and happiness are on the rise. We created Sexy Ads after meeting through adult personals on the net back in 1994. When you’re feeling like you need to offload something. In fact, men – especially heterosexual white men – tend to have few deep, emotional connections with other men. The strange thing is, it didn’t used to be this way. In fact, having an intimate friendship with another boy became undesirable, a mark of suspicion.In fact, social isolation is actually as bad for you as smoking. A lack of close friends – not people you chat with on Facebook or social media or the guys you hang out with at work, but close friends – correlates to increased levels of depression and increased levels of stress.
Letters between friends in the 19th century might be mistaken for love-letters today because of the way men were freely willing to admit that yes, they cared for one another.