Dating two months
It won’t always be me that calls off the relationship first, but usually by that time, I’ve given up — so I don’t care that [the other person is] ending it.” If you find yourself either feeling lukewarm (due to a loss of interest) or conflicted because of certain differences between you and your date, ask yourself the following questions to assess whether or not the relationship’s really worth the time you’re investing in it: 1. When feeling confusion over a relationship, it’s easy to get into the habit of asking for advice from friends, but only you can know what’s really best for yourself. Has this person shown up in your life with integrity and authenticity? A person’s words and actions must match up if trust is to be established. Or conversely, maybe you can envision the two of you growing closer over time, even if you’re not certain how committed you are to the relationship at the moment.
But don’t mistake the voice of fear (“You’ll never meet anyone else,” “You’re too picky! It may sound simplistic, but take the time to consider these questions: “What do I want? But putting yourself in that scenario mentally should help give you a “gut check” on how to proceed.
Think of it like a probationary period at a new job.” Lesli Doares, therapist and author of , agrees that the career metaphor is a helpful way of looking at dating and managing the stay-or-go decision: “Going out and meeting people is akin to sending out your resume. The early stages of a relationship are comparable to an internship.” Doares sees the two-month mark as “the time when people are letting out more information about themselves and seeing how good of a fit they are for the long term. Don’t buy a dog together, an antique table together, or a couples’ membership to the zoo. Unless you’re just splitting the cost of dinner, keep purchases separate. Your date wants to get to know YOU, not that jerk who dumped you. Your first month of dating might turn into your last. It’s okay to have separate lives, especially this early on. Draw some careful boundaries for your burgeoning relationship. Related: Don’t ask him to reschedule his life for you. Don’t expect him to cancel poker night for your friend’s wine and cheese night. Let her brag to all of her coworkers about you for months before you make an appearance. But everything else about the person was awesome, so I tried to look past it.As I experience it more and more, it becomes like nails on the chalkboard to me.